I don’t really believe in New Year’s Resolutions – I figure that if I made it through the holidays without killing anyone I’ve shown enough discipline and intestinal fortitude that I don’t need your steenking resolutions. But I feel like I miss out on that feeling of achievement people claim to have when they accomplish things, and I hate missing out, so I’ve developed a strategy. Following in the footsteps of a college friend who once resolved to start smoking and gain weight (he succeeded), I am going to try to be lamer! And you for, the blog reader (if you do indeed exist) that means that you can look forward to a lamer, less interesting blog in this new decade! Congratulations!
Yes indeed, you can count on me to review movies everyone’s already seen, music nobody likes and books with small words and lots of pictures. My spelling will get worse and I’ll use lots of adverbs. I’ll talk about what I had for lunch, post pictures of my pets in funny clothes and talk about how much I enjoy working in Foster City. In short, I plan to make reading my blog an experience akin to hanging out with your second cousin who you used to hang out with one summer in sixth grade, but haven’t seen since and who is now an insurance salesman.